Thursday, August 31, 2017

Out of darkness We Rise



If for some reason you do not know what has happened in the last week, let me fill you in. Southeast Texas became the target for Hurricane Harvey 2018.  The most devastating, catastrophic hurricane in the last dozen years.  That's what meteorologists say anyway.  And I would tend to agree with them.  It struck the Corpus Christi area first last Friday in the predawn hours and then meandered before making up its mind.  While stuck in limbo, it brought flooding rains to what I call home.  I don't just mean scattered floods.  I mean floods turning streets into rivers.  

Although I was very, very fortunate to not lose power, stay high and dry (as well as my car), I was stuck inside because of Harvey.  What a name?!  He came in with a force, screwed up everything everyone had ever planned.  I became good friends with my treadmill and the one in our fitness room. I was determined to make my 10k step goal each day and I was successful.   I didn't storm the stores beforehand for "hurricane food."  This was a good time to clean, I told myself.  But sitting in front of the television, drinking my coffee, I felt compelled to watch what was going on around me.  I felt productive just being able to walk and work out to get to those 10k steps.  

I was actually glad there were no chips and dip in the house.  No cookies, Twinkies, candy, anything that might be considered a pass during this tragedy.  I would open my refrigerator door and stare at the contents from time to time.  But also realizing I had to save what I had since stores would be almost bare.  I was worried I would want to eat.  That ended up not being the case.  I made some skinny muffins (and they tasted great)....2 SP for lemon ones and 1 SP for cherry vanilla.  So all you do is take 1 lemon cake mix, 1 container of lemon yogurt (I used Dannon Key Lime) and 1 cup of water.  Mix altogether and bake these delicious mini treats for 15 minutes.  I was able to get 50 or so little muffins.  For the Cherry Vanilla muffins, use Betty Crocker Cherry Chip cake mix, 1 cup of plain Greek yogurt (I guess you could use cherry yogurt), and 1 cup of water.  Same principal, different flavor.  I did eat those on Sunday.  I was going to track all week, but abandoned that idea.  Not sure why. It wasn't like I was eating things I shouldn't.  Tracking just wasn't a priority.  

I noticed I was feeling like I had lost some more weight.  My Weight Watchers location was closed so I have continued with the momentum for last week thru this week.  I am stoked to see what my loss is come Friday morning.  Out of boredom, I looked at clothes in my closet.  Since putting on about 20 lbs., some things became snug fitting.  I tried on some pants I had put on the back burner and they fit! I thought, oh goodness!  Then I tried on a dress I specially bought for an event a couple of years ago.  It fit!  I was elated.  

Maybe I'm out of my slump.   Out of the phase of eating chocolate and graham crackers.  Eating things just to eat.  I tried riced cauliflower recently and like it.  I am getting back to honoring my body and treating it with the healthiest possible choices.  Although I think maybe a tender, sensitive tooth or gum may play a part.  

I realize it's hard to stay strong during tragedies like this.  I could have filled my basket at the store with cookies, chocolate chips, etc.  I could have eaten the rest of the chocolate cheerios.  I could have succombed to a few glasses of wine.  But I didn't. I knew I needed to be strong. If I had lose some weight, I didn't want to ruin it.  I was couped up in my house for 3 days.  Yogurt, oranges, a few apples, cheerios, and strawberries was the extent of my inventory.  I am headed back to that happy number.  I am so proud of myself for working hard the 2d time around and getting it back off before it became a hurricane itself.

In tough, and I mean tough, times like this, sometimes we surprise ourselves.  We become stronger and empowered.  We give ourselves a pat on the back for not touching the cookies someone brought in.  It can only get better.  Think of it as milestone.  Progression.  If we can weather a storm like Harvey, and be a Weight Watcher, and look up at the sun and smile, then we can tackle anything.  


Tuesday, August 15, 2017

What's so scary about commitment?



"Commitment is what makes a promise into reality."  "Commitment comes as a result of choice, not conditions." 



Why do people find it hard to commit to something?  Is it the fear of what might happen if there is success?  Or what might happen if there is a failure?


In order to be committed to losing that extra weight, walk a little more.  Eat more fruits and veggies. Definitely skip those extra glasses of wine.  After 5 glasses (and 20 SP), no one looks attractive. There has to be commitment.  Set the alarm; maybe rip off the snooze button so it can't be used. Totally skip the donut case and go straight for the fruit and vegetables.  

What's causing that not to happen?  Fear?  Losing weight can be difficult for some, especially if the struggle has been the entire life.  Don't even mention body image.  From a young age, I battled with my body image.  It got worse as I got older to the point I didn't like looking in the mirror.  But once I made the commitment to better myself and become healthier, the fear lessened.  Before I started Weight Watchers this last time, that brought me to success, I had been a perpetual member.  Joining, losing maybe 5-10 lbs, then quitting.  My mind, I suppose, wasn't ready for complete lifestyle change. That is until my health intervened and said we had no choice.  There was the commitment to lose weight and become healthier, or commit to die.  

I will admit I am a creature of habit.  However, I embraced the changes I needed to make in order to live the rest of my life.  But I won't lie, it was difficult navigating through the early stages to get there.  The early change was fast and furious.  So much I didn't stop to take time to embrace it.  This time around, the change is somewhat tough and slow.   I have always had a fear of failure that the weight would find its way back.  And the fear has come to fruition.  I feel my commitment this time around is not as strong.  I need to find out why.  

In this commitment-phobic world, it's so easy to abandon something fear of failure at it.  If I truly wan to lose this weight I put back on, then my commitment must be steadfast and strong.  There are days I feel like giving up.  I have felt discouraged lately.  But if I gave up, what would that say? Who would win?  

Not sure why I can't wrap my head around it again like before.  Is it because I've become too comfortable?  Too relaxed?  There are days I am not honest with myself.  The old adage and anecdote, If no one sees you eat it, then it didn't count, crosses my mind.  I eat things I shouldn't.  Mainly on Sunday after the meeting.  

I do not fear commitment.  I welcome commitment; in relationships - whether with another person or myself.  At this moment, it appears I have to be committed to myself.  If you didn't read, I have abandoned my dating blog and the idea of finding love altogether.  So right now, I am committed to myself.  So what is the next strategy?  Commit to walk 5 miles in the morning. Not 4.5 or 4.75.  Not enough to get my 10k steps.  Commit to NO MORE chocolate.  Yes, I ate chocolate on Sundays.  

Commitment.  It's a dangerous word.  But if it's embraced, it can be your friend.  Reality can grow from promises.   

Christina