Anything Is possible

 "No matter what life dishes out to you, you can always put one foot in front of another and keep going.  You keep going and you cross the finish line." - Ironman finisher 

This week marked 3 months since I had a total hip replacement.  I have two  PT sessions left then I am on my own.  I've been told I am doing great it is all up to the mindset now.  My mind telling my body this is the way things will be done.  I am slowly returning to normal activities.  I continue to increase my walking and complete a mile.  It is still humbling to start again and retrain the mind and body, especially after the feats I have accomplished.   I suppose at one time I felt invincible.  I keep the faith and know God is watching and guiding me - correctly this time.  Not that he guided me down the wrong way before.  

So if you've read some of my other entries, you know that this time every year our somewhat small urban neighborhood hosts the GOAT of all triathlons.  Ironman Texas - the North American championship.  I knew I would be able to volunteer - to what extent I didn't know.  Because I enjoyed it so much last year I signed up for two shifts at the athlete check-in.  And to help our our local run club at their aid station on the run course.  One of those gave me a smidge of anxiety.  

The athletes did not disappoint at check-in.  I thoroughly enjoyed chatting with them while helping them register and give them their bibs.  There was a table with cow bells that celebrated every first timer.  I talked with an athlete who was of course nervous - and it was his first full (I think).  While chatting with him I joked and asked if he lost a bet.  He replied no, it was really him and a few friends drinking whiskey one night.  After a few glasses, they said "Let's do an an Ironman."  And here he was - a year later.   To some I am sure it sounded like a whirlwind decision at the time and now that they were getting their bibs, checking in their bikes, they probably weren't sure what they signed up for.  I had the pleasure of speaking to a man who was one of the friendliest athletes to stop at my table.  I asked if his wife would be watching and he said sure.  He also had 3 small people as well - ended up being his young daughters.  Before he walked away, I handed him 3 pink swim caps.  His parting words were some of the nicest I've heard.  When I told him about the beach-like aid station he said he'd look for me.  

I had a day in between race day when I'd spend several hours on the run course.  I was anxious the night before.  Although I'm getting around better, I’m not 100% and I wasn’t sure how I would hold up.  But it all melted away when I showed up to the best Hawaiian aid station.   Wind was terrible whipping everything around.   I knew I needed to be there for the athlete I saw at check-in just a few days earlier.   He came running through our aid station right before 6:30. I took a picture of him. 

When I told a volunteer at check-in I was a “double shifter” as she called it, with a look of confusion she asked “Why?”  I told her why.  She found that I wanted to spend all day helping admirable.  I do this for motivation and inspiration.  

Similar to almost ten years ago, I feel this is a fresh start.  God sees what I want to do.  The goals I have.   I can start from where I am - not the spot I was in ten years ago.  I can train correctly, get stronger, and crush my goals.  Motivation and inspiration is at its finest at Ironman.   Congratulations to the athletes who took on this feat and finished!  I want to be like you one day.  

I’ll do it of course while running with glitter all the weigh! 

Christina 💗

"One day you will understand why things had to happen the way that they did."

 Sometimes the journey is not straightforward. 

My weight loss journey certainly had its share of roadside stops and detours. But I eventually reached the destination.  I then continued to add running and challenging myself.  Although for the most of it I was blind to an issue that would eventually sideline me. 

Two months have passed since my hip surgery.  I don’t remember anything that day past being rolled out of preop.  I think I saw the OR but that was it. Next thing I know I woke up in recovery.  The real work was about to begin.   My coach came and was allowed to see me in recovery.  She's been one of my constants through the challenges the least two years.  

For the last year (maybe two), walking was uncomfortable.  My gait was not right.  It became uncomfortable to walk or run.  The last race I did was a 5k in January of 2023 and the last time I was able to do miles was sometime in February, maybe March.  And even then it was uncomfortable. I also became self-conscious about how I looked walking.  

After consulting an orthopedic, I decided to get a total hip replacement.  It would be my first ever major surgery.  Was I apprehensive?  Yes.  The information I read about preparing for surgery and recovery seemed overwhelming.  

But I was told a hip replacement was the only option if I wanted to return to pain free daily activity - and maybe one day running.  The conservative exercises and stretches would not remedy the situation.  

During the six week "precautions," I was frustrated that I couldn't bend over.  There is still some uncomfortableness feeling from time to time, however the pain vanished around week 2.  The pain from the knee and IT band (and any other muscle) on the left side is almost non-existent.  

So, here we are.  Physical therapy has been a constant for the last two months. After the initial six weeks, it was suggested to extend therapy to work on endurance, stretching and neuromuscular.  I did squats for the first time in no telling how long.  The workouts consisted of strength work and mobility.  The leg presses seemed easy compared to what I had worked on prior to surgery.  I worked on a "hip deck" machine and increased the weight to sixty pounds on my last workout.  These last few weeks, I've worked on the neuromuscular part to train my brain to walk the right way again.  

My last post op visit to the doctor was several weeks ago.  Everything looked good I was told.  I do have a scar but I can't really see it, although I feel it.  On the six month mark, I'll get x-rays.  I saw the x-rays taken during surgery.  They're cool! 

I am excited about returning to what I enjoy doing and what I was doing before.  And feeling like the person I was before this all began. Although I was told this is the new me. The last time I enjoyed it without pain was probably 2021.  I have missed our trails, getting miles done, and just being able to move.  My coach once told me I have more want to than anyone she knows.  Earlier this month I decided it was time I started walking again.  Slowly of course.  Although part of me is still self conscious.  But I get out and walk nonetheless.  I dealt with this pain and awkwardness for more than a year.  It takes time to get back to normal.  I hoped to be walking fast or slow running by end of the year, but it may be next year before I am fully ready to go for speed.  

I still have plans and can't wait to see them through.  The year 2026 will be a special one to me, but more on that later.  

God never gives us more than we can handle - although I know we sometimes question.  He wants us to achieve our goals and dreams.  He knows what I want to do.  So if that one day is not immediate, I know it’s only temporary.  Will it be when I step on the pavement for a walk without pain?  Maybe it'll be when I cross my first finish line in over a year.  

Whenever it might be, it'll be covered in Glitter all the Weigh! 

Feel free to follow me on the Insta! 

Christina 

God is figuring it out….

 

Trying to figure it out alone doesn't help.  God has already figured it out and He's asking you to trust him.  In 2023, things didn't go according to my plan.  It was supposed to be the year I finally caught up to the person who had awesome paces.  Who overcame challenges and obstacles that hindered her path.   Except I stopped chasing her.  Instead she was found only in pictures of the proud accomplishments.  

The year became one of twists and turns - and not in a good way.  The fall I took in 2022 hung around.  My last chance to get miles in was early in 2023 and after that it became uncomfortable.  Trusting what the sports therapists and trainers thought I continued to strengthen my muscles - thinking they were weak.  But after a visit to the doctor, it was determined I had arthritis in my low back.  However, trusting the therapists again, I was encouraged that it would be manageable.  

My walking /running slowed and eventually stopped.  It didn't mean I wasn't moving.  One of the twists involved lending the movement of my legs to someone who was immobile.  He didn't like it but that was the card he had been dealt.  Pushing the wheelchair was a workout of its own.  There were days my back revolted.  I was thankful for my upper body strength.  Crossing finish lines took a back seat.  But it didn't stop me from showing up and cheering other runners on.  And if truth be known, I was a little envious I was not able to be running along side them.  I somehow had been called elsewhere where I was needed.  

The wheelchair was no longer being pushed.  And although he tried his hardest at trying to walk again, it was not going to happen.  In the last few months of 2023,  I relied on my strengthening workouts with my ever positive trainer.  Instead of pushing the wheelchair I sat by his bedside and watched him lose all movement.  At the same time, being grateful of the movement I still have.  My legs were not getting in miles as before, but they still carried me.  And although my body felt tired at times, I kept moving.  His tired body eventually surrendered and let go.  Even if I wanted to get miles in, the mourning and grief I experienced took over.

It wasn't until October that I stumbled upon another bump.  Arthritic hips.  The doctor was surprised I accomplished what I had with the arthritis in my hips.  I started to wonder if this is what I left it.  If it was, then I was proud of what I accomplished. The numerous finish lines I crossed. Finishing a 3rd half marathon.  My first triathlon.  Maybe the bucket list in my mind was not approved by my body.  I would have to learn to be okay with that.  But....I decided (only so I could walk normally and get back to pain free normal living) to get hip surgery. 

So enter the new year.  I scheduled the hip surgery for later January.  I started Googling articles on returning to power walking/running after a hip replacement and have been encouraged with the results.  Does that mean I can maybe pick up where I left off on my list of goals?  Possibly.  I am not opposed to amending my goal list, for that matter, my bucket list.  So maybe a full marathon is not in the cards.  I am content with finishing a half for the 4th, 5th, and 6th time.  Would I like to finish another triathlon?  Absolutely.  Does it mean crossing off running down the red carpet finish line after tackling 140 miles of sweat? Maybe.  

I am hoping 2024 will be somewhat flat like The Woodlands Marathon course, with maybe a hill or two.  I plan on making myself a priority.  Ten years ago I had an a-ha moment.  God walked through that storm with me.  I know He is with me for this one - because he knows I am STILL not done.  There's a big celebration coming in 2025 - or 2026.  I can't remember.  That's for another blog.  

Because today is not that day!  It helps that it's covered in glitter all the weigh.   Happy New Year! 

The taken path

 "For every path you choose, there is another you must abandon...usually forever."

It's funny how certain events are guideposts along one's path.  We may think WE choose the path we are on but the PATH may have chosen us.  I started out on one path and have ended up on a totally different one.  But I believe all the smaller ones (perhaps small detours) taken were small guideposts to direct me to the more important path.  

Timing. I’ve had difficulty understanding that concept in the past.  Whatever I’m anxious to happen is not on my time but God’s.  Maybe there’s something to timing and these paths taken.  Similar to certain people showing up in our lives for a specific time.  

When I changed the way I eat I knew I must leave the old me behind. When I started losing weight I showed the other me the door.  She’s made an appearance now and again.  

The road to the finish line is filled with struggle, doubt, progression and uncertainty. At the same time it’s a reminder we decided to take this path.  My list of 23 things in 2023 has been off to a slow start.  

From my first 5k to triathlon, I made the running/racing path my home.  I thought this is where I’m to be.  The path has been lined with awesome motivators and encouragers.  But recently I took a detour.  Or I was silently persuaded or directed to this detour.  

People say it’s when you are unable to do something, that’s when you want it the most.  So I put aside my racing bibs for awhile.  But while doing that I still wanted to stay on that path. Running.  So I decided to volunteer when I can. It won’t be forever.  Maybe the volunteering chose me.  To show me that among the self doubt and uncertainty there is a community of runners who anxiously await for me to be back on the pavement. I’ve been at the finish line to give them their medal “with all my heart” as my friend put it. 

It is often repeatedly suggested to listen to the body.  Well I guess I didn’t do a good job recently.   So the body chose for me. Too many ungraceful stumbles?  Maybe.  Being too hard on myself.  Possibility.   

Maybe, just maybe everything that is happening is to prepare for a greater path.  I found out something this week that was not what expected. I had a moment, maybe two, and hoisted myself off the couch and dusted myself off.  I declared to a few friends I intend to fight.  You WILL see me at the start line and finish line in 2024.

It will be paved with glitter all the way! 

Christina 

See y'all at the finish line!....eventually

"There will come a day when I will not be able to do this.  Today is not that day." 

I had the awesome opportunity to volunteer with The Woodlands Marathon recently.  I truly believe volunteering will change any mindset or knock out any self doubt or what ifs.  

I've been sidelined lately so this was my way of staying involved with all things running. I enjoy meeting  people, especially those that are tackling any distance for the first time.  

This was my second year to volunteer at the finish line to hand out medals.  It was a very special morning.  I volunteer because that's what I like to do.  And it's the unexpected moments that make it so much worthwhile.   

There was the moment a young runner from the run club I'm in asked me to hang the medal around his neck.  And he gave me a hug that melted my heart.  I think because of him I passed on that hug to all my friends who finished after him.  It was totally unexpected.  It was that moment, a friend told me, God gave me to show how amazing people think I am.  

I met a lady the day before who wan an elite in the race for the first time.  She was so excited.  I causally mentioned to her I'd be at the finish line handing out the medals.  Not expecting her to actually find me.  When you cross the finish line, there are bundles of emotions going through the head.  Yes getting the well deserved medal is high on the list but maybe not who hands it to you.   This woman looked for me as she crossed the finish line and found me.  Did I remember her?  Of course I did! 

Or the lady I worked with at the VIP/Elite table who also ran the half marathon.  We saw each other as she approached the medals.  She found me to tell me she broke her own record....with tears in her eyes.  I cried with her.   And true to the quote by John Blais, yes I got it on film.  

I hugged all my friends who crossed the finish line.  Genuinely proud of them.   One of them suggested there needs to be hugs at every finish line.  I wholeheartedly agree with her.  As always, I was inspired and motivated when I left my post after giving numerous congratulations and kudos to tired runners.  

I can't exactly pinpoint the reason I started running.  One day my friend and I just decided to run intervals.  Then she was there by my side when I finish my first half marathon seven years ago.  I think we all need someone like that.  To excitedly come home from work, change into run clothes, run 3 or 4 miles in the blazing sun.  Or encourage you at mile 9 of a half marathon that the last four miles is a piece of cake for someone who is out there every day knocking out miles.  

But I've learned this is who I am.  I am a runner.   I have whined about my legs being tired or my muscles not as engaged as they need to be.  When there are people with far more serious disabilities conquering huge feats.    

I am anxiously awaiting when I can return to running and more finish lines.  So it takes me a little longer to get it done right now.   

What if I just didn't show up?

"To stay on the map, you've got to keep showing up."

Everyone has them.  Those days it would be easier to go off the map.  Fly under the radar.  Asking the question what if I just didn't show up?  

I've pushed myself more this year than in past years.   I conquered some new challenges, tried to get on the same page as my over enthusiastic mind, and stepped  farther away from this thing I call my comfort zone.   The box.  I may not have retreated back to the box, but I have moved backward.   What I thought was progress was just several steps back after taking a step forward.  

Currently I am trying to find the joy again in what I do.  Those words come from my #secretproject person.  The joy in getting miles in before dawn.   But through all of these things, I still show up.  I still crawl out of bed (most days) and get out there and get something done.   I have learned over the past several years that I do not like feeling limited to what I can do.  

I wrote about my first experience with a full on triathlon.  A short triathlon.  I remember as I stood at the swim start line and my friend looked on, I told her I couldn't do this.   Yet, with her (and many others) words of wisdom, I swept whatever thoughts of not showing up to the side and finished.  

Let's do some time traveling, shall we?  There are a few who are not familiar with my story....the journey I took.  It would have been easy for me to leave things the way they were, take the medicine, and leave things unchanged.   What if I just didn't show up?  Didn't show up and make that 360 degree life change.   What if?  I know if I had just not shown up I wouldn't be alive to motivate and inspire (discreetly) others.  I wouldn't have the  privilege to experience the things I have experienced.  I wouldn't have met the awesome people I now know and call friends.  

What if I just didn't show up? The start line to the many races I have completed.  The finish line I cross, most times with happy tears, as a symbol my body can do most anything.  I owe myself to show up and give it 100%.   Even on the days I much rather not. If I had just not shown up, I wouldn't know it's possible to lose 202 lbs. and have a life I'd only imagined.  

Take a breather and ask this; What if I just didn't show up? To the invitation from a friend.  Doing something out of the norm.  Taking a chance....on anything.  It's true nothing good happens inside the comfort zone.   

I continue to push myself.  Take those chances.  Sometimes good.  Sometimes not so good.   Then there are surprises.   But what if I had just not shown up?  We'll never know.  

What if you just didn't show up?  I'll continue to show up...and with glitter all the weigh of course! 

Hope my hot weather friends stay cool and hydrated!  

This is not a dress rehearsal

 "Understand that this is not a dress rehearsal.  Face your fears, live your dreams.  Take it all in, yes every chance you get, come closer.  And by all means, get it on film."

There is only one life.  One life to live to its fullest.  Take those risks, learn to step far outside the comfort zone.  Do things that are scary.   In March of 2014 I was given a second chance to live this life.  To eventually take risks, enjoy all of its wonder.   Step outside my comfort zone - eventually so far I think I need to put it up for sale.   I went from being isolated to knocking out close to a half marathon a day, scaling an indoor rock, and conquering downward dog on a paddleboard.  

I conquered my first triathlon recently. Blame my over confident enthusiastic mind.  Choosing an all girl race and the shortest distance, I thought it would be something I could handle.  It fell under something new, risk taking, and further outside the comfort zone.  Swim. Bike. Run.  The three parts of the multisport.  At first glance, 200 yd swim, 8 mile bike ride and short 2 miles seemed doable.   My vintage Huffy was about to get a work out.   

"What will get you to the finish line is nothing compared to what got you to the start line." 

Despite the abundance of encouraging words, I was focusing on the one task that might give me difficulty.  The bike.  I hadn't hopped on the old Huffy in about a year and a half.  What's the quote?  It's like riding a bike - you never forget.  Well, it was a little more difficult than that.  I focused too much on this giant (yes although short, giant) task in front of me.  My first multisport "race."  I fail to look at how far I've come.  To see the work that got me to this point. 

The morning started with me setting up in transition.  I forgot my flip flops but a runner friend loaned me hers.  Made mental note to include flip flops in next triathlon bag.  I stood at the shore line watching the support kayaks position the buoys.  Along with the other orange capped ladies, I slowly made my way into the water.  I swam about one third to the buoy and it hit me I was in open water.  The cliff notes version of the swim is that I did finish and make it to the shoreline and headed towards T1.

With some assistance, I successfully mounted my vintage Huffy and took off on the 8 mile course.  I wasn't out to win anything or even try to finish in record time.  I pedaled my way along the course repeating I can do this.  I forgot to mention I was the LAST cyclist out of transition.  So the only thing for me to follow was the orange cones.   I was in tears  as I reached the finish.  I had completed the bike.  What I thought would be the easiest was the most challenge. Two miles.  Should be no problem.  My legs thought otherwise.  But some amazing women made sure I would not quit - coming to find me on the course.  This is the point where I usually run across the finish line.  But on this day, I was just happy to walk across the finish line.  I got that medal and knowing I didn't give up.  I conquered something new.  

Will I do another one?  Most likely with more training.  And a new bike. After all, the road to the red carpet has to start somewhere.   And it's not without struggles.   I was reminded that I CAN do great things.  Sometimes the struggles take center stage and the progress we make takes a back seat.  It sits there quietly, sometimes gently nudging you.  

By the way, yes I got it on film.  Well my friends did.  The next one I do, I'll be more confident and better, and as always, will do it with glitter all the weigh.  

 

Remember to face those fears, live those dreams most of all...get it on film.

Christina